The Life of a Sinner
by Cressidia
Summary: They say a life cannot be created artificially. They say I was sent to this country to carry out my fate. They say the Truth does not harm anyone. They lied.
1. Chapter 1

The Life of a Sinner

Chapter 1:

Ed:

"Come on Al! Put the cat down you're gonna make us late!" Ed said as he said as he rounded the alleyway.

"Aww but he looked to lonely" Said Al as he joined up with his brother, feet clanking with each step. Ed checked his pocket-watch on the inside cover etched a constant reminder of a home that they set themselves free of.

"Cats have been on their own for centuries Al, it'll be fine. We can't be late. Ugh Armstrong will yell at us and say something like how punctuality has been passed down in the Armstrong family for generations."

"Haha! Yeah you're right about that brother" said Al. The two boys rounded another corner together. It was as if all the people of Central gathered around the center of the city. Many soldiers lined up, guns at the ready on their shoulders. The smile left Ed's face. Ed spied Hawkeye through the mess of people and soldiers.

"Hey, why are all those guards here? Who is coming?" Edward asked quietly as to not let the people of Central hear him.

"The king of Xing is giving Fuhrer Bradley a gift. That's all I know about it." She said with a shrug. It was silent as the car pulled up. A sleek black automobile, out of it came an older man who looked to be about in his 30's. The man turned on his heel and gave his hand to someone in the car. Out from the car he dragged a body. It looked to be a female, she was short in stature and quite skinny. Attributes such as these don't match up with the definition of a man. She had a cover over her head so that she could not see. Her hands were bound together. She must be so scared thought Edward. What sort of gift is this?

Shu:

A hand across my back forced me to my knees. A flash of light blinded me as the cover was ripped from my head. I cowered my hair protecting my eyes as they adjusted to the bright light. Why am I here? Why did Jin bring me to this place? This city has no life in it. Its walls are white and shallow. Its people are fascinated by me. I am nothing special just empty space in a flesh shell. I looked up at their king. His stare took the breath from my lungs. This feeling, I know the fear that grips me to the bone.

"King of Central, I have brought you a creation of the Xingese King." Said Jin, the only brother I have contempt for. Jin is 15 years my senior. I have a small body but I am every bit of 20 years old. The King of the lifeless city rose from his chair.

"I gladly accept his gift." The look in his eye told me that this man would be the death of me. I have get away. I gasped as Jin sliced the ropes that bound my hands. I stood strong against my foe. I heard a clap and a faint whisper.

"I hope you are an intriguing gift Shu." As I turned to face him everything around me turned white. I was standing in a vast space. The outline of an old enemy sits in my sight, awaiting my return.

"Welcome Shu" the door behind my foe opened. Thousands of tiny hands reached for me calling my name over and over again. I will not die here. I cannot die here. I made a promise to someone that I wouldn't die in this wretched place. I can't remember who it was. That doesn't matter I have to keep living, I have to keep moving. As I turned I was back in the middle of the square, Central. Daylight flooded my eyes once again. The blueness of the sky treated my eyes to color once again. Screaming came from all directions. What is that thing?!

No! The gate had not yet closed. Arms were making their way towards innocent people. They were meant for me! Damn it! I clapped my hands together and placed them on the ground. A flash of blue light surrounded the arms keeping them caged. The cage was closing fast I have to get out otherwise I will be trapped as well. People were running. I got out just in time. I have to close the shield. Just as I clapped my hands once again and place them onto the shield closing it one of the arms touched my forehead. Images came flooding into me. Life, death, rebirth, and multitudes of knowledge.

The shield closed and broke the arm but it was too late. It was all black. I had hazy memories of soldiers standing around me and a suit of armor with a boy. In my dream, the one called Truth was taunting me. I ran but I could never escape. At that moment I knew I had died.


	2. Chapter 2

The Life of a Sinner

Chapter 2:

Note to viewers: I listened to Brothers while writing this, it really set the mood.

Shu:

"I can't die yet! I can't! Damn you to Hell Truth! You took her from me! I want her back! She is all I have in this world! You can't take away my only joy!" I was sobbing uncontrollably at this point. My throat is sore and dry with a deep sadness.

"It's all my fault. I have to get her back." I managed to choke out.

"What can a measly human like you do?" It said to me.

"Don't you dare mock humans! I'll kill you myself!" I wanted to rip his throat out.

"I am keeping your precious one from you, I don't think you should kill her keeper." A white outline was drug out from the chasms of the gate. A white figure of a girl no older than 10 came from the chasm and was chained up. Truth yanked at the chain, taunting me.

"I will kill you for this, I swear on my life!"

"Oh that's right I forgot you can't see her can you? I have already taken your memory of her. Now it is like she had never even existed. With that said why would you go to all that trouble to get her back?" Said the Truth.

"Because she's- she's m-my." I held my head, it hurt so much.

"See it was no lie, you cannot remember her. You will continue to forget your purpose in life and thus your soul is mine. Two for the taking. Ahahahahaha!" he mocked me.

The white chained figure was crying and pleading with me but I could not hear her. I reached my hand out to try and touch her. Our fingers brushed and a bright light exploded sending me back. I was falling constantly. I heard echoes of men speaking but I could not understand what they were saying. I did not want to hear anything from anyone. I just want her back. I have to have her back. The tears were streaming down my face without effort now.

"Hey she's awake!" said a puny boy. Braided blonde hair and a red coat. The boy from earlier just as I thought I was dying. Wait I'm not dead! My pupils reacted with this realization.

"I have to find her! Do you know where I can find her!" I pleaded with the boy. He looked back at me with a sad expression. Was it pity or sympathy?

"I know the gate is a scary place. I don't understand what he took from you though? The doctors said your internal organs were unscathed and you sure as hell don't look like me so how?"-

"My memories. They are gone. It's just as he said. She might as well never have existed in the first place." I said looking at the floor of the hospital room. A cold hand whipped itself across my face. My head still laying low.

"Brother! You could hurt her!" said the suit of armor.

"Have more faith in yourself! The fact that you can tell that your memories are gone is proof enough that she is alive isn't it?" the boy said sitting in a chair next to my bed.

Once again my breath escaped me. He was right. I looked at him now with a new light in my eyes. The boy smiled and gave me his hand. I gawked at it.

"What do I do with it?" I asked perplexed at his strange gesture.

"You shake it. It's a way of making friends here in Amestris." He explained. I took the boys wrist and shook it from side to side. What an awkward boy.

"No! Like this." He said correcting the form and shaking up and down. He smiled again. I gawked at the man in the armored suit. He is so tall and so robust. He must certainly be a formidable foe. The boy tapped his forehead and walked over to the armor.

"This scrap of metal here is my brother Alphonse. My name is Edward Elric. Alphonse may look intimidating but he won't hurt a fly." Ed chuckled.

"Wow. Al you must be like my brother. He is 15 years older than I am." I explained and gawked in wonder. What incredible genes their family have. Such a difference between the two.

"Oh! No, No. you misunderstand. Ed is my older brother, see nothing inside here." Explained Alphonse as he lifted the head of the armor showing me the hollow shell and a blood mark at the back of the neck.

"WHAT?! How is that even possible?!" I said nearly jumping out of bed.

"Yeah I know it's hard to believe but you have been to the gate and back. So have we. Our mother got sick and died suddenly. Our father never came home. It was just us for a while until we decided to bring her back. Something went wrong with the human transmutation and Al lost his body. I lost my limbs in the process. I was able to recover Al's soul and tie it to this suit of armor and this is where we stand today. On the upside at least you have your entire body intact." Ed said looking down at the floor periodically.

"That's where you have it wrong Ed. You can remember the good times you had with your brother and you can speak to him now and tell him that you care about him. You have no idea how much I want to see her face. Just for a moment that's all I need. I just want to remember her." I said to him. I tried the best I could not to cry, but a tear escaped my eye. I quickly rubbed it away with the sleeve of my shirt.

"Tell you what, how about we help each other? A little equivalent exchange won't hurt. You help us look for the Philosophers stone and we'll help you find your Jane Doe. What do you say?" Ed said.

"Alright I will help you. But what's a Jane Doe?" I asked.

"Haha! Never mind. Here let's go searching around the city. Al and I have a few leads and you look like you could use some fresh air. Um pardon my asking but what was your name again?" he held out his hand and I shook it again correctly this time. I told him my name was Shu. Ed laughed a second time and explained that this time the gesture was to help me out of bed.

My feet were wobbly and it took me a minute to straighten up. My hospital gown was open a bit at the top showing a bit more than I would have wanted. I blushed and had no time to react. Ed was staring down at me in awe. Oh no I've just made friends with the biggest pervert in Central! What Ed said next did not help the situation.

"Oh my God I think I'm in love!" he said.

"WHAT?!" I exclaimed, covered my chest, and looked away. My face was now as red as a tomato.

"Al she's shorter than I am! Isn't it great! Someone I get to call Shrimp!" he said with laughter in his voice. I let the air escape my lungs. What a relief, he's not a pervert, he's just amazed that I'm short-.

"I am not a Shrimp thank you very much! What's wrong with you? Look at your hair how unnaturally yellow it is. You look like a squash!" I said as I trampled over his foot. He reacted with it so I hit the right one. I smiled at the thought of being happy again. Did she and I use to fight like this? Ed retorted my comment with accusations of, "Al it doesn't look that bad does it?" Al and I laughed as if it were the funniest thing in the world.

I have a new hope now. I will find you and bring you back. You can count on it.


	3. Chapter 3

The Life of a Sinner

Note to readers: Tell me how I am doing. :)

Chapter 3:

Shu:

It took me a few days to get used to being beyond the gate. I got down a few times but Ed and Al cheered me up. All I have to do is keep moving forward until I reach my destination. I still don't know what her name is. I wish I knew it so that it might spring up some memories. Besides calling her by her gets really boring.

"You alright there Shu?" asked Ed, resting his head in his hand. I broke my gaze out of the train window. Al leaned over.

I blushed and wove my hands back and forth,

"No. No. I'm fine really. I was just thinking that I wish I knew her name. It might make me remember her" I said. I hope they don't think I am some weirdo who sulks all the time. My father explained it once. Depression is like when you sit in the wake of a river forever, letting it crash against your back as you are stuck in the mud.

"I won't be stuck in the mud anymore!" I said to no one in particular. Ed and Al looked thoroughly confused. They both laughed so loud that the back of the train car could hear them. This made me blush again. There I go again. Going off on tangents. Oh well at least I'm not so sad anymore. There were some days when I wouldn't talk to Al or Ed. I think those were the worst days. Now I just need to keep moving.

I rose from my seat and excused myself. I went to the back of the train car. A closed off section was reserved for restrooms and snacks. I did my business as quickly as I could and strange hor d'oreuvres caught my eye. I sampled the variety of tastes. Ham and strange cheeses. Some of them were pungent and I didn't bother with those. I went to grab a piece of meat labeled roast beef. A hand went and grabbed it before I could. I followed the direction of the hand and saw that my brother Jin was eating it. I stepped back immediately.

"Why are you here?! Didn't you sell me to that King?" I said.

"I can't check up on my dear little sister?" he said finishing the appetizer with a loud gulp.

"Jin never calls me sister. Who are you?" I said analyzing him.

"Oh. Damn. This happened last time too when I killed that officer in the telephone booth. I guess I'm getting rusty after all these years." Said a voice I did not recognize. When I saw him transform into someone else I realized this had to be a Homunculus like from the legends my father taught me. This is bad I thought. I tried to open the door but he kicked my chest and I fell on the door as it broke from its hinges.

People were screaming and running from the train car to another. Ed and Al came over they were clearly shaken up.

"Shu?! Are you alright? Envy. What do you want with Shu?!" Said Ed standing his ground. He knows this Homunculus? What does this Envy guy want from me?

"Yeah I'm fine." I rose from my landing spot and massaged the place he'd hit. That will turn into a bruise later. I can't use Alchahestry for all of my injuries otherwise your body will begin to rebound from the effects of it.

"Hey it's Shrimp and Little Shrimp! Nice to meet you again. Look I'm not here for much. Just a little test." Said Envy.

"Don't call us Shrimp you palm tree!" Ed and I said this simultaneously. Envy went charging for us. I made a staff with Alchahestry. Envy is a slinky bastard. I kept blocking and making attacks. Envy scratched my cheek as he reached for my head pulling it close to his mouth so I could hear him speak.

"It's a shame you don't remember me my darling. I used to love her too you know." I gasped at his words. Somewhere in my heart I knew he was telling the truth. Tears welled up in my eyes. Why can't I remember all of it?! What happened to me to know Envy? I attempted to impale Envy with my staff. It drew blood and it was surely enough to kill a normal person but he regenerated.

"That wasn't so nice after so many years of separation, honey" he said anger was clear in his voice he choked me and kissed me at the same time. Everything around me was going black I couldn't breathe. Suddenly Envy released me with a harsh yell. Ed landed a hit on Envy's back.

"Run Shu" said Ed holding Envy back. Memories were flooding into me from nowhere. I couldn't move. All I did was stare at Envy. Rage overtook my body. I stood, my feet pounding on the isles' wooden floor. I clapped my hands together and had Envy by the throat.

"Why do you know my sister?! What did you do to Mirai?!" Saying her name took me for a whirlwind of emotions. I slammed Envy's head against the wall of the train car.

"Hahahaha! Now that's more like it Shu. You'll be a perfect candidate. I love it when you get feisty. But it seems I'm out of time. Ta-ta Shrimp and farewell Shu." Said Envy as he broke away from my grip and jumped out of the train car. I punched the wall of the train car to let out steam. How could I let him get away from me like that? After all that has happened to me. I still can't figure out all the pieces. I looked over to Ed and Al who were huddled together and shaking.

"What?" I said.

"You're like teacher-scary Shu" said Al. Ed nodded.

"I don't care." I said leaving the back of the train car for an empty spot up front. I gazed out the window for a few minutes.

"Where are you Mirai?" I said as I curled up my legs to my chest and burying my face in my knees.

Before I knew it the train had stopped and we had to keep moving. I gathered my senses and walked with the Elrics. Heading towards nowhere in particular. Al was the one to speak up. I was tired and my eyes were swollen from a night of crying and lack of sufficient sleep.

"What do you remember Shu?" Al asked quietly. I didn't look at him. I stayed preoccupied watching people at the train station.

"Envy took the disguise of my late husband. He tricked me into believing human transmutation worked. Al I don't want to talk about it." I said paying no attention to him.

I was in a daze all day. I couldn't go to sleep. I waited until Ed was asleep and Al slipped out to take care of a cat he saw through the window. I left a short note on the bedside table and I left. They won't be happy when they find out what I'm going to do. I'm sorry Al and Ed I have to do it.


	4. Chapter 4

The Life of a Sinner

Chapter 4:

I had just enough money with me to get another train ticket back to central. Half way to Central I had cold feet about the entire thing. I eventually snapped myself out of it. There is no going back now. It took me an entire day just to get back. It was night time. I let myself slump against the wall of an alleyway. I was hungry but that was going to change very soon. Soon I won't need anything as trivial as food.

"Sister. Why is Mama in the ground?" said Mirai softly as she tugged on my sleeve.

"Because, she, she's went to visit someone alright?" I said not knowing where she is myself I had to lie to her. I held my sister's tiny body. All I could think was why me? What did I do to deserve this? I have to make it right. What kind of God if he loved me at all would make me feel such pain?! Mirai and I made our living selling fruit in the main city of Xing. It was a horrible way to live. Our brother did nothing with all his money and all the people he knew.

I hated him immensely for that. I lived for my sister. In turn she lived for me. I had no idea how to be a role model but I improvised and went all with it. Mirai always used to ask me, "What is in my name? And what is in your name?" I would always answer her with, well you are my future and I am the gentleness that dwells within you. I never knew what I meant by those words. It just felt so right, so true to me.

On the night I became a sinner, I felt like my soul had been ripped from me. It was a stormy night. The flower shop keeper had lent us her home. That's where I met my husband. Or at least who I thought was my husband.

"No. You can't take her from me! Not now! Mirai!" she was dying of tuberculosis. I didn't have the money to get her medicine or even a decent Alchahestrist. Her body was long cold and I still held her close to me. My husband suggested that I bring her back. So on that same night I tried. The cost of my sin outweighed every bit of knowledge my father taught me. That was five years ago. The first time I passed through the gate was an eye opener.

At that moment I knew death could never be undone. I carried my sin with me everywhere I went. I can't remember how I got back to our world but I made it. I kept running from the King and his newly appointed general, my brother Jin. Every year I would go back to the slums where our little hut used to be. We weren't rich enough o own pictures so I just remembered both Mirai and my mother. Even though my thoughts were hazy and I could only remember bits and pieces I kept them as close to my heart as I could.

I have learned now to keep a distance from people. They lie, cheat, and steal. They also love, cherish, and heal. Too many people in my life were unforgiving. It is hard to trust people I do not know but that is the part of madness I have within me. I will blindly go wherever you lead me.

Nostalgia flooded my mind as I woke in the alley. It was a steady rain plip, plip, plipping on my head and soaking into my clothes. Ed and Al are bound to be hot on my heels. I rose and saw that no one had yet woken. Or was it that no one would walk outside in the rain? This street reflects how lonely my life has turned. The coldness in my fingers reminds me of the bitter-sweetness in my heart.

I let myself descend into the catacombs of Central. I wasted time wondering the tunnels. Thinking and Re-thinking about Mirai. Her life, death, and her morbid rebirth. A light blinded me as I took the last few steps at the end of the tunnel. A familiar voice greeted me.

"See I knew you would join us my dear." Said Envy.

"Where is Father?" I requested.

"Candidate, Come here." Said Father. I willingly joined his side and fell to my knees. I looked up at his eyes. I saw an ancient power in them. Father cupped my jaw in his palm raising my head. I have waited for this moment for eons. Father shifted in his chair to speak to only me.

"Take what you have earned my daughter, the rage that echoes within me, now echoes within you." He said. I was crying but my eyes gave sorrow no satisfaction. A steady lifeless rage welled up in every fiber of my being. I let my laughs echo through the tunnels.

"Your wish will be granted momentarily Father." I said as I breathed my first breaths as a Homunculus.


End file.
